© Ruth Plunkett
2007
Design by Jodi
Head
Sculpture © Marigold
Plunkett
| About Counselling People enter into counselling for many and varied reasons. For some, the reason appears quite clear, for others it is not so. In some cases, cause and effect has been recurring uncorrected for so many years that the individual may pass a cursory glance over the following list of symptoms and say, "I think that nearly all of those apply to me." I have found that the problems which people present to me in the therapy room fall predominantly into one or more of the following categories. |
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- Things that we know and understand but cannot reconcile At some time during our lives, most of us become directly affected by a sudden or uncontrollable external events or changes that we find difficult to come to terms with. However hard we try, it seems impossible to get life back to how it was before and we are left feeling unhappy, distressed and helpless. Possible causes could be; BEREAVEMENT, TRAUMATIC EXPERIENCE, ILLNESS, WORK STRESS, REDUNDANCY, RELATIONSHIP BREAKDOWN or CHANGING FAMILY CIRCUMSTANCES A supportive counselling relationship is intended to foster hope within the individual and to assist the person to discover ways of integrating the changed circumstances into their lives in order that they can begin to move forward again. |
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| - Things that seem out of our awareness or only partially known Sometimes, for reasons that might not seem apparent, we experience chaotic and confusing thoughts and feelings that can, literally, overwhelm us. Even being aware that a number of things in life are not going well, often does not provide a sufficiently adequate explanation or understanding of why we feel as we do. Common symptoms may include; ANXIETY, MORBID FEARS, FEAR OF SEPARATION OR LOSS, DEPRESSION, RELATIONSHIP DEPENDENCY, POOR INTIMATE & SOCIAL RELATIONSHIPS, SENSE OF LOW ACHIEVEMENT, EXCESSIVE INTAKE OF FOOD OR ALCOHOL Professional counselling offers the opportunity to explore the root cause of our pain and thus begin to change such uncomfortable states of being. |
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| - Past influences (often tied in with root causes) The human psyche has a remarkable ability to remain stuck in the past, which can create an illusion of restricted choices and limit a person's desire and courage to change. The purpose of counselling in this context is to help a person live more freely in their present lives. However, we are all, in the present, the sum total of our past conscious and unconscious experiences. A consideration of the past and its consequences is, therefore, integral to the counselling process insofar as it encourages a person to become liberated from, rather than codemned to, it. |
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| - Relationships with others "When
one is a stranger to oneself
one is estranged from others too" Vita Sackville-West For most of us, forming satisfying relationships with others and communicating easefully forms the comfort zone within which we experience our sense of well-being. Disharmony or breakdown in relationship, whether intimate, social or in the workplace, is often therefore the final straw which pushes people over the threshold and causes them to seek help. Frequently, by the time a relationship breaks down, we are no longer in a position to recognise the difference between the other person's emotions and behaviours and our own. The counselling process helps individuals to first of all re-connect with their own sense of personal identity. As Vita Sackville-West and many others have stated, in order to enjoy satisfying relationships with others, we need generally to be in a satisfactory relationship with ourselves. Those conflicts which reside within us are often painful and destructive to ourselves and others. It is these inner conflicts which counselling aims to help resolve in order that we can begin to rebuild healthy relationships. Once at peace with ourselves, it also becomes clearer as to which part of the relational problem lies with ourselves and which part needs to be passed back to the other person. |
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| For more information or to make an appointment Tel: 07767 294426 or Email: ruth@ruthplunkett.co.uk |
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| The Old Fire Station Clinic, West Street, Goudhurst, TN17 1AA |